The Most Infuriating Cancelation Of 2022 – Looper Staff Picks

Netflix, c. 2021: Psst…you should watch “Warrior Nun.”

Me: No. Why. What even? Nun Hermione? I’m good, thanks.

Netflix, 1,000+ x, c. 2021-2022: It has sword fights, Kim. It’s called “Warr—

Me: I KNOW WHAT IT’S CALLED, ROBOT. I prefer my fantasy in other realms/time periods, as you well know.

Netflix, again, c. 2022: Psst…you shou—

Me: I will find a way to destroy you.

Netflix c. two days later: …So you’re like, that jerk who doesn’t watch something just because it’s popular? Laaaazyyy….

Me: UghhhfFINE! Fine. But only because “The Last Kingdom” is over. I don’t have to prove myself to you.

*Two days, several episodes later*

Me: Crap. I can’t remember the last time a show surprised me this much. Or did so much showing instead of telling. Or moved the genre forward so much without shouting, “Look! We moved the genre forward so much!” after moving it half an inch. Gah, Season 2 is even better. Really took off once she stopped talking to herself. Hold up — is that an erotic pastries van full of ninja nuns? Yeah, there’s nothing else like this on television.

Netflix: Omg yaaayy! We knew you’d like it! Um but real quick/JSYK…this isn’t on television either. We uh…we canceled it. I knooow, riiiight? Sorry, bb! FWIW, we did renew “Is it Cake?” You said you liked compelling questions. So.

Me: Are…is this a joke? This show has a massive following, you know that, right? Also, the sword kept glowing, you sadists. You can’t just not continue the story when a dead person’s weapon…it’s…it’s against all laws of nature. You’re really gonna DO THIS? Turn me into a fan that Googles “petition to renew…?!” Ya know what? No. It’s fine. I’m fine. We’re all fine. YOU WIN, algorithm. You always do. And I always knew this is how I’d go out: crying into a cardigan pocket full of Chex Mix, defeated by a robot corporation, screaming into a computer screen. *Sigh*…R.I.P., “Warrior Nun:” in this life or the next, as you used to s—

My husband: …who the f*** are you talking to??